Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
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Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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