Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.