i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.