Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
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I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
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I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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