So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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