these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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