Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I think i got beer on your cat.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
