my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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