I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
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i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
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Who wants vodka and apple sauce
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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