Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
