i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize