ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
