Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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