I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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