Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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