Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
