yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize