another moral hangover. fuck.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize