Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
You were trust falling into bushes
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
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