I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
