Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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