dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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