I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
