But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
