I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
