Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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