Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize