He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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