We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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