okay pat passed out under dana's car
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
he was CRYING into my vagina
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize