he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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