She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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