whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize