it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize