I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
