I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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