I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
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This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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