capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize