it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize