you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
