So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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