What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
