In the future we'll all be gay
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
There r osticjed everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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