we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize