Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.