redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.