Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Randomize
