I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
