If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
