Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
