The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
