Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
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You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize