using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize
